New Year, Same You

I love New Year’s. My wife and I geek out over reflecting on the previous year, the books we read, the success or failures of previous goals we made, then thoughtfully dreaming about how we want the New Year to play out. I know a lot of people do Resolutions but this is way more than that for us.  It is truly our most favorite time of the year and it has blossomed to this, because I believe our ritual has become more authentic and less superficial.  As an adult, I recognize that most relationships are built on “should be” similarities.  We should like the same food, drink, political affiliations, financial goals and parenting philosophies.  We should all like the same vacations, movies and bands.  But what happens when what I should like, I just don’t?

Have you been authentic with your coworkers about your love of middle school fiction? Or your kids room mom, that you  oppose buying crappy chocolate to raise money for a new Projector and would rather buy organic craft made chocolate at the farmers market because its good and kids need to just have longer at recess.  Or would you dare put a Trump and Biden sign in your yard and say you like both?  I don’t think many of us would.

As a parent, I get a front row seat to see this evolution of humanity happens in real time.  The absolute innocence of babies and toddlers expressing exactly what they like and dislike.  The way to fast recognition when they realize they are different than others.  The move to suppression of characteristics that don’t morph into the “popular group”.  To the expressed desires that now start to feel group think.  I sit here wondering is this healthy and good.  Is it inherently a part of our survival instincts to fit into a group or is it something that is pushing us to live a false narrative that will put our kids into a massive deconstruction phase of life (a midlife crisis isn’t just cliché, but real).

So today, I speak to all of us.  Rekindle that uniqueness.  Dust off those interests and desires and build on them.  You, and those around you will be better because of it.  And as you recognize that its ok to be different, remember to accept those differences in others as well.

New Year, Same You.  And that is really exciting to think about!!